A number of riders know HOW they do it.

Fewer riders know WHY they do what they do.

Why does an exercise like shoulder-in exists? What is the purpose of this exercise? What is the cause of this exercise? Do you belief in this exercise?

Most riders communicate with their horse from the outside in, from the clearest thing (what) to the fuzziest thing (why).

But the inspired riders all act and communicate with the horse from the inside out and they start with WHY*.

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Outside-in communication

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Riders who start with WHAT will communicate like this:

“Horse, I have here this exercise we are going to do! It looks nice and fancy, a lot of other horses can do it too and if we can master it we can show it to other people.

You just have to bring your shoulders in.

Shall we try?”

Inside-out communication

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Riders who start with WHY will communicate like this:

“Horse, I have a dream and that is to keep you fit as a riding horse until old age. I strongly belief this is possible, however you are not naturally built to carry weight. Therefore we need to prepare you to carry me properly and making your body and hind legs supple and strong.

The way to achieve this is using this exercise and I know how.

Shall we take the first step?”

Reverse the order of the information

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It doesn’t matter WHAT you do, it matters WHY you do it.

Don’t ride just a ‘shoulder-in’, because then you will end up riding the “name” and you will only move the shoulders of the horse in, without awareness of what the rest of the body and the inside hind leg are doing.

Don’t start with WHAT but reverse the order of information and start with WHY:

1. You have to know WHY you do it, why the exercise exists, what the purpose of the exercise is: to make the hind legs more supple and strong and to enlighten the fragile front legs.

2. The next step is knowing exactly HOW to guide the horse with mental, energetic and physical aids.

3. And as a result you will end up with the WHAT: a correct shoulder-in.

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If you only ride ‘the names’ of the exercises (the WHAT), you will lose the essence (the WHY), therefore you don’t exactly know HOW to do it and you will end up with a “look-alike” which doesn’t help the horse in a gymnastic way.

Start with why

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If you do not know WHY you do WHAT you do, how would your horse know.

If you strongly belief in WHY you are doing things, your horse will feel your clear energy towards a clear goal and horses always resonate to clarity.

Those riders who start with WHY have the ability to really inspire their horse and to work with the right essences.

Straightness training always starts with WHY. Because without a clear WHY the end result will always be uncertain.

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*A concept of Simon Sinek.

You may also like this article: The essences of lateral movements

The third Monday of January has been awarded with this cheerless title due to a combination post-Christmas blues, credit card bills on the doormat, failure of New Year’s resolutions and – in Europe – cold dark nights and awful weather.

The result: feeling down, being inactive and the tendency to give up totally.

Here are 9 things you might like to think and do to stick to your goal, beat Blue Monday and to beat winter blues this week

1. Never. Give. Up.

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Have you “broken” your resolution yet? It is always too soon to quit. When you give up, it means you never wanted it. Just think about how far you’ve already come before you think about giving up. Don’t give up just because you had a bad day. Forgive yourself and do better tomorrow!

And remember: It doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you DOn’t quIT. No matter how slow your progress is, you’re still ahead of everyone who isn’t trying! So take a deep breath, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and continu!

2. Welcome your struggles!

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The biggest problem is that riders think they are supposed to NOT have problems with their horses.  But remember, it’s not happening TO you, but FOR you. You can’t always get what you want, you get what you need! You better love problems! See them as gifts, as a challenge, as an opportunity to learn and grow! The goal is not being without problems, but getting ‘better quality’ problems so you can learn more.  So honor your struggles, they make you stronger, they make you smarter, and when you overcome them, you always become a better version of yourself!

3. Focus 100% on the solution!

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Stop focussing on what is not working, stop talking about the problem and start thinking about the solution. Never spend more than 10 percent of your time on a problem with your horse, and spend at least 90 percent of your time on the solution. And even better: spend 100 percent of your time on solutions, and no time on problems! It’s okay to identify your problems with your horse, but give all your power and energy to solutions.

4. Ask better questions!

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Ask better questions to get better results. Ask resourceful questions, that means don’t ask “Why” things happens, but ask “How” you can make things happen.

Don’t ask ‘WHY’ questions:

• ‘Why can’t I do this?”
• “Why is this happening to me?”
• “Why can’t I ride?”

Ask ‘HOW’ questions:

• “How can I do this?”
• “How can I make the best of it?”
• “How can I learn to ride and enjoy the process”?

By asking yourself the right questions, you’ll engage your brain to help you find ways to solve your problems.

5. Raise your standards

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If you want to change your circumstances, raise your standards. Stop accepting certain things. Write down all the things you would no longer accept in your life, all the things you would no longer tolerate, and all the things that you aspired to becoming. Turn your “shoulds” into “must” and your “some days” into “today”. Stop saying “I wish” and start saying “I Will”… and then change your approach and DO something today!.

6. Get moving, start doing!

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By changing your physical state you can change the way you feel. If you are feeling down, take a deep breath, start moving, go to your horse and give him for example a good massage! Doing good for your horse is the best way to feel better! Or take a long walk with your horse, through a forest, park or mountain and let nature inspire you!

7. Focus on gratitude

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When some things go wrong, take a moment to be thankful for the many more things that are still going right. “What are you grateful for?” Ask yourself: “What’s good about this thing that goes wrong?” “What can I learn from this?” We should commit to learning from our mistakes, rather than beating ourselves up.

8. Eliminate energy robbers.

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Ask yourself “What are the ‘things’ that rob me of energy?” “What things cost me physical energy? What costs me mental and emotional energy?” Find the 20% of the things that are robbing you for 80% of your energy. Then make a plan on how to eliminate these energy robbers from your life. Every time you subtract negative from your life, you make room for more positive!

9. Plan something new with your horse.

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Try something new with your horse. Whether it’s planning a clinic, or deciding what to do next weekend, looking forward to something new or different can be uplifting and refreshing. Start a new course, learn something new to get your brain active and start thinking of new things instead of dwelling on the old.

Enjoy Blue Monday!

When you experience problems with your horse, do’nt quit, never give up. There’s no such thing as “having a problem with your horse”, just breakthroughs waiting for YOU to make them happen.

On the picture you see my horse Maestro when he was young and having problems with ME! I was his biggest problem (and fortunately I also became his solution ).

Thanks to the ‘problems’ I gained an immense amount of knowledge and experience in the fields of natural asymmetry and straightness training.

So sometimes the ‘bad’ things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the ‘best’ things that will ever happen to us.

You don’t always get what you want, but what you need. Maestro was my challenge, my opportunity to learn and to grow. And I am very grateful to that!

So never give up and never quit, because your ‘problem’ can be an unbelievable gift in disguise!

1. Decide what you want and decide your goal

Before you start training and riding your horse it is important that you have a defined goal. Follow your heart. Life’s to too short to spend it doing something with your horse you don’t love. So what’s your passion, what are your goals and dreams? What would you like to reach within 4 weeks, within 4 months, within 4 years? If you absolutely knew you couldn’t fail, what would you do together with your horse? Write it down, and every day make a small step towards that goal.

2. Nurture your vision

• Keep focused on your goal, visualize your goal and use your imagination. By closing your eyes and imagining some things – to really see – you will increase the chances that it actually will come your way. Nurture your vision, daily – see, feel, hear how you will be experiencing the fulfillment of the life you want together with your horse.

3. Believe in yourself, in your horse and in your vision

• Nothing can stop the rider with the right mental attitude from achieving a goal and nothing on earth can help the rider with the wrong attitude. Some riders have strong beliefs that they can’t do something or that their horse can’t do something. But you can’t be a better rider tomorrow, if you are thinking about yesterday’s disappointments all the time. Before you start training your horse, you will need to put all your negativity aside or see if you can convert negative thoughts into supportive, positive ones. Think in terms of challenges instead of problems. See possibilities, instead of difficulties. Don’t limit yourself by your thoughts. Decide every morning: “Today I will be the best I can be”.

4. Create a plan

• If you can dream it, you can do it, but without a plan you’re going to stay where you are. So create a plan for yourself in order to reach your goal. Create a plan that breaks the goal down into specific steps: Which book are you going to read and when? Which course are you going to join and when? On which days are you going to train your horse and what are you going to teach your horse?

5. Surround yourself with great people

• Gather positive riders around you. Spend time with riders who are supportive and for you. Enrich yourself by getting to know others who are actively creating the best for themselves, and learn from them. Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Don’t let those who gave up on their dreams influence you to give up on yours. Don’t let anyone’s drama or negativity stop you from being the best you can be. Don’t lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs. Instead wait for people to rise up to your expectations. Really great people make you feel that you too can become great! So hang out with like-minded riders!

6. Learn from other riders

• Many of the things you want to know have already been experienced by other riders. You can achieve much more by studying what others have already done. Then you can build upon the knowledge you gain from them and it gives you much better results in a much shorter time frame because and you aren’t reinventing the wheel again.

7. Find a rol model

• Find someone you admire, or wish you were more like. It could be a rider who always has a smile, or a famous rider who really accomplished his/her dreams. See what makes that rider so great and try to do what s/he does, read what s/he reads, approach things how s/he approaches things. Seeking the best in others brings out the best in you.

8. Take action and keep momentum

• The path to success is to take massive, determined action. By constantly acting, you are automatically gaining more knowledge just by virtue of the response you are receiving from your interactions with your horse. Be willing to learn, practise, improve. Continue, hold on, keep on going, and never stop moving towards where you want to be. Life doesn’t require that we be THE best, only that we try our best. Never give up, great things take time!

9. Think and reflect

• Whenever you reflect on your own thoughts and actions and the reactions of the horse, you gain a greater sense of clarity about yourself and your horse. Take action, notice what’s working or not. Look at the consequences and learn from them. And don’t be hard on yourself, there is no such thing as ‘wrong’ or ‘mistakes’, there are only instructive outcomes. Don’t think you are not good enough, remember: Success comes from good judgment. Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment .

10. Change your approach!

• Change your approach until you achieve what you want. Just take responsibility when you don’t get the results you want: Either you weren’t clear, or you didn’t have enough preparation, or you asked your horse something he wasn’t ready to do, or you asked something with too much pressure on the rein, or you stopped breathing, ….  Just laugh at yourself and change your approach. Welcome your struggles. They make you stronger. They make you smarter. When you overcome them, you always become a better you.

 11. Count your blessings!

• Keep your long-term goals in sight, but focus on the moment and count your blessings every day. At the end of each day ask yourself 5 questions:

1. What did I learn?
2. How can I use any unpleasant experience?
3. What was really great today?
4. What am I grateful for?
5. What did I give and contribute to the life of others?

Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, but don’t compare yourself or your results to someone else’s. You can never be another rider, you can only be a better version of yourself. One of the marks of excellent riders is that they only compare themselves with themselves and with their past accomplishments and future potential.

12. The journey is the goal

• It is not what we get or achieve, but who we become, what we contribute: that gives meaning to our lives. The final aim is that rider and horse can grow and develop together and be well together! Focus on continuous physical, mental, emotional and spiritual improvement. Don’t look for stars and stripes. Growing and giving is the game! Try not to become a rider/trainer/instructor of success but a rider/trainer/instructor of value.

“The major reason for setting a goal is for what it makes of you to accomplish it. What it makes of you will always be the far greater value than what you get.” – Jim Rohn

Enjoy your own path!

These are also great thoughts about age and seniority:

• Age is whatever you think it is. You are as old as you think you are. ~ Muhammed Ali

• I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am. ~ Francis Bacon

• The man who is too old to learn was probably always too old to learn. ~ Henry S. Haskins
  

• Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young. ~ Henry Ford

• Nobody grows old merely by living a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. ~ Samuel Ullman

• Many old rider was honest enough to admit that he didn’t become a fine and sensitive rider until he had lost most of his youthful physical strength. Since then he was able to get everything done with his horses in a quiet, confident way, what he previously thought only could be achieved through dogged struggle. ~ Gustav SteinBrecht

• If you could not add years to your life, add life to your years. ~ Unknown